1 00:00:03,086 --> 00:00:06,298 ♪ The Simpsons ♪ 2 00:00:10,636 --> 00:00:11,637 [whimpers] 3 00:00:15,891 --> 00:00:19,561 [chalk screeching] 4 00:00:23,398 --> 00:00:28,237 [screaming] 5 00:00:28,320 --> 00:00:31,573 Oh, hello. Tonight, a special Simpsons. 6 00:00:31,657 --> 00:00:34,117 Two tales of the curious and bizarre. 7 00:00:34,201 --> 00:00:37,996 Anything can happen in the Yellow Mirror, 8 00:00:38,080 --> 00:00:40,374 except a third tale that's definitely not gonna… 9 00:00:40,457 --> 00:00:41,875 -[grunts] -[glass shatters] 10 00:00:41,959 --> 00:00:43,335 [♪ "Roar" playing] 11 00:00:46,129 --> 00:00:48,465 -♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪ -[Homer] ♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪ 12 00:00:48,549 --> 00:00:51,426 -♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪ -[Homer] ♪ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh ♪ 13 00:00:51,510 --> 00:00:58,267 ♪ I got the eye of the tiger A fighter dancing through the fire ♪ 14 00:00:58,350 --> 00:01:01,728 ♪ 'Cause I am a champion ♪ 15 00:01:01,812 --> 00:01:04,982 ♪ And you're gonna hear me roar… ♪ 16 00:01:05,065 --> 00:01:09,486 [screams] The dark… [screaming] …what is that thing? 17 00:01:09,570 --> 00:01:10,946 Oh, wait. That's supposed to be down there. 18 00:01:11,029 --> 00:01:14,199 [screams] What are those? Oh… Oh, those go with that. 19 00:01:14,283 --> 00:01:19,037 [screams] I fell. [screams] I'm standing. 20 00:01:19,121 --> 00:01:21,832 I got to get out of here. Where's the door, where's the door? 21 00:01:22,708 --> 00:01:26,670 [whimpering] It's just… [stammers] …it's just a blackout, kids. Don't be scared. 22 00:01:26,753 --> 00:01:28,171 -[Marge] Mm-hmm. -[Lisa, Bart] Mmm. 23 00:01:29,631 --> 00:01:33,385 Hey, I found a puzzle. Remember Lupé the Snoopé? 24 00:01:34,177 --> 00:01:38,599 Fifty pieces? [groans] How many corners does it have? 25 00:01:38,682 --> 00:01:42,060 I always liked that Lupé the Snoopé taught young girls 26 00:01:42,144 --> 00:01:45,022 that they can be the cutest little detectives. 27 00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:48,275 I didn't learn about women's rights until I was in high school. 28 00:01:48,358 --> 00:01:52,362 When you burnt your bra. Classic retro protest. 29 00:01:52,446 --> 00:01:54,698 Well, it got you detention, and that's how you met 30 00:01:54,781 --> 00:01:56,366 and ultimately settled for Dad. 31 00:01:56,450 --> 00:01:58,368 -Tell us that story again. -Mm-hmm. 32 00:01:58,452 --> 00:01:59,619 Okay. 33 00:01:59,703 --> 00:02:03,749 [sighs] It all began by the flagpole at Springfield High School. 34 00:02:04,249 --> 00:02:07,210 The first step to liberation is to free ourselves 35 00:02:07,294 --> 00:02:09,546 from these male-imposed shackles. 36 00:02:09,629 --> 00:02:11,965 [Marge] It was actually Jenny Cushnik's bra. 37 00:02:12,049 --> 00:02:13,759 I didn't want to burn my bra 38 00:02:13,842 --> 00:02:15,969 'cause it was cold out and I tend to get nip-- 39 00:02:16,053 --> 00:02:17,596 [Homer] Oh. And I had the coolest car! 40 00:02:17,679 --> 00:02:19,556 It had a chain steering wheel. 41 00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:21,808 I'd drive around in my sideburns, like… 42 00:02:21,892 --> 00:02:22,893 ♪Yeah ♪ 43 00:02:22,976 --> 00:02:24,144 [Lisa] Dad! 44 00:02:24,227 --> 00:02:25,646 ♪ Some call me the gangster of lov-- ♪ 45 00:02:25,729 --> 00:02:28,357 -What? -You just interrupted Mom. 46 00:02:28,440 --> 00:02:32,402 It makes me feel like you don't care about what I have to say. 47 00:02:32,486 --> 00:02:35,447 What? No, I love the things you say. 48 00:02:35,530 --> 00:02:40,744 Do I sometimes wish you'd say them in a more concise, less rambling way? 49 00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:41,828 -Mm-mmm. -Mm-mmm. 50 00:02:41,912 --> 00:02:45,457 No. Please continue, honey. I'm listening. 51 00:02:46,375 --> 00:02:51,797 [sighs] So I had just committed my first act of activism, but then I-- 52 00:02:51,880 --> 00:02:53,090 -Is that lamp on? -[Marge groans] 53 00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:56,009 How could the lamp be on? The power is out. 54 00:02:56,093 --> 00:02:58,428 You interrupted Mom again. 55 00:02:58,512 --> 00:03:01,348 It's okay. I don't need to talk. 56 00:03:01,431 --> 00:03:06,144 No, honey, you should talk. I won't interrupt you again, I promise. 57 00:03:06,228 --> 00:03:07,604 [Marge] Mmm. 58 00:03:07,688 --> 00:03:10,982 So Principal Dondelinger shows up and he says, 59 00:03:11,066 --> 00:03:14,778 "Miss Bouvier, you just bought yourself one day of detention. 60 00:03:14,861 --> 00:03:17,030 You know where and when." 61 00:03:17,114 --> 00:03:18,156 [all laughs] 62 00:03:18,699 --> 00:03:20,283 Which, of course, I didn't. 63 00:03:20,367 --> 00:03:21,868 [laughs] That is funny. 64 00:03:21,952 --> 00:03:24,788 -[electricity crackles] -Yes, family time is over! 65 00:03:24,871 --> 00:03:29,042 -Whoo-hoo! -But now it's bedtime, so lights out. 66 00:03:30,001 --> 00:03:31,503 Hmm. 67 00:03:38,802 --> 00:03:40,595 -[sighs] -[electricity crackles] 68 00:03:40,679 --> 00:03:42,472 [gasps] 69 00:03:42,556 --> 00:03:43,807 [shivering] 70 00:03:43,890 --> 00:03:45,058 [buzzing] 71 00:03:47,436 --> 00:03:50,272 [Homer whimpering] 72 00:03:50,355 --> 00:03:51,982 [Teen Barney] I think he's waking up! 73 00:03:52,566 --> 00:03:54,943 Homer, how you doing, bud? 74 00:03:55,026 --> 00:03:58,029 Hey… [stammers, mumbles] What's happening? 75 00:03:58,113 --> 00:03:59,239 Where's… Where's Marge? 76 00:03:59,322 --> 00:04:00,407 Who's Marge? 77 00:04:00,490 --> 00:04:02,826 -Marge, my wife. -Wife? 78 00:04:02,909 --> 00:04:06,204 Do you think he scrambled his brain when he smacked his head? 79 00:04:06,288 --> 00:04:07,956 I smacked my hea… Ow! 80 00:04:08,039 --> 00:04:11,543 Don't you remember? We met in the morning as usual. 81 00:04:11,626 --> 00:04:13,670 Hey, Homer, you're late for English. 82 00:04:13,753 --> 00:04:15,797 [Teen Homer blows raspberry] English? Who needs that? 83 00:04:15,881 --> 00:04:18,300 I'm never going to England. Come on, let's go smoke. 84 00:04:22,012 --> 00:04:24,055 [inhales deeply, coughs] 85 00:04:24,139 --> 00:04:25,182 [coughs] 86 00:04:25,265 --> 00:04:26,266 [bell rings] 87 00:04:26,767 --> 00:04:29,394 [coughs] Oh, no. We're late for wood shop. 88 00:04:29,478 --> 00:04:32,105 But we're early for lunch. Let's go grab a burger. 89 00:04:32,189 --> 00:04:34,733 Boy, you never stop eating and you don't gain a pound. 90 00:04:34,816 --> 00:04:37,778 Ah, it's my metabomolism. I guess I'm just one of the lucky ones. 91 00:04:38,445 --> 00:04:41,656 Well, well, well, if it isn't Homer Simpson and Barney Gumble. 92 00:04:42,282 --> 00:04:44,534 Springfield's answer to Cheech and Chong. 93 00:04:44,618 --> 00:04:47,412 [Teen Barney] But, Homer, you had a plan… 94 00:04:47,496 --> 00:04:51,792 [grunts] No evidence. [screams] Ow! [grunts] 95 00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:56,171 [grunts, groans] 96 00:04:57,714 --> 00:05:00,258 You were unconscious for five full minutes, 97 00:05:00,342 --> 00:05:05,388 which means you're fine according to head trauma guidelines of this year, 1974. 98 00:05:05,472 --> 00:05:11,061 I was only out for five minutes? It felt like years. 99 00:05:11,144 --> 00:05:16,233 A warped perception of time is no excuse for tardiness. Get to class. 100 00:05:16,316 --> 00:05:17,943 [Teen Homer] Mmm. Mmm. 101 00:05:18,026 --> 00:05:23,114 Barney, when I was unconscious, I dreamt I was married. 102 00:05:23,198 --> 00:05:26,159 Cool. Did your dream wife let you kiss her? 103 00:05:26,243 --> 00:05:31,373 No, Barn, listen. In those five minutes, I… I lived a lifetime. 104 00:05:31,456 --> 00:05:35,252 I worked at a nuclear plant. My son had an elephant. 105 00:05:35,335 --> 00:05:39,214 Son? [chuckling] Hey, guess she did let you kiss her. 106 00:05:39,297 --> 00:05:44,427 You're not getting it! My life as I know it never existed. 107 00:05:45,303 --> 00:05:49,850 Well, that sucks. On the plus side, it's fish stick Friday. 108 00:05:49,933 --> 00:05:52,269 Yeah, that does help. 109 00:05:52,853 --> 00:05:55,063 Keep the board tight against the fence, 110 00:05:55,146 --> 00:05:58,400 otherwise the board kicks back, hits you in the stomach, 111 00:05:58,483 --> 00:06:02,946 you fall forward, face hits the blade, face goes everywhere. 112 00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:05,574 -[Teen Homer] Did I make you all up? -[bell rings] 113 00:06:05,657 --> 00:06:08,201 Wanna go taunt that police horse that hates us? 114 00:06:08,285 --> 00:06:12,205 [gasps] Three o'clock, room 106. That's the detention room. 115 00:06:12,289 --> 00:06:14,249 This is where I'm gonna meet Marge. 116 00:06:15,041 --> 00:06:17,168 [♪ "(They Long to Be) Close to You" plays] 117 00:06:17,252 --> 00:06:20,964 ♪ Why do birds suddenly appear ♪ 118 00:06:21,047 --> 00:06:23,675 ♪ Every time you ♪ 119 00:06:23,758 --> 00:06:25,719 Wait, aren't you going to detention? 120 00:06:25,802 --> 00:06:29,556 What? No, um, I don't have detention. 121 00:06:29,639 --> 00:06:31,683 Ew, what happened to your voice? 122 00:06:31,766 --> 00:06:35,020 [laughs] Okay, well, that's a different approach. 123 00:06:35,103 --> 00:06:39,190 You are interesting. My name is Lydia. 124 00:06:39,274 --> 00:06:42,360 Lydia? That's the stupidest name I've ever heard. 125 00:06:42,444 --> 00:06:45,906 [laughs] Oh, my God, you are a riot. 126 00:06:45,989 --> 00:06:49,326 Hey, would you like to go to the prom with me? 127 00:06:49,409 --> 00:06:53,663 No. I mean, I'm sorry, you're just not her. 128 00:06:54,289 --> 00:06:56,541 Mmm. Ruh-ro. 129 00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:58,001 Ew! No! 130 00:06:58,627 --> 00:07:03,298 It was all just a dream. There's never going to be a Marge. 131 00:07:06,176 --> 00:07:09,763 I still can't believe the Empire struck back. 132 00:07:09,846 --> 00:07:11,806 You think the Jedi will ever return? 133 00:07:11,890 --> 00:07:13,558 [scoffs] No freaking way. 134 00:07:13,642 --> 00:07:15,101 Be right back, guys. 135 00:07:15,685 --> 00:07:18,772 [Young Adult Homer crying] 136 00:07:18,855 --> 00:07:20,190 Huh? 137 00:07:20,273 --> 00:07:22,942 Homer? Oh. Crying again, huh? 138 00:07:23,026 --> 00:07:27,447 Listen, I know you're sad about Starsky and Hutch getting canceled, 139 00:07:27,530 --> 00:07:28,948 but don't you think it's time you-- 140 00:07:29,032 --> 00:07:33,328 Barney, all these years I've been lying about why I'm constantly sad. 141 00:07:33,411 --> 00:07:38,375 The truth is, remember when I got knocked unconscious in high school? 142 00:07:38,458 --> 00:07:40,752 -When you dove into that empty pool? -No, not that time. 143 00:07:40,835 --> 00:07:42,712 When you slipped on that croissant in French class? 144 00:07:42,796 --> 00:07:43,797 No, not that time. 145 00:07:43,880 --> 00:07:45,674 When you slipped on that croissant in biology? 146 00:07:45,757 --> 00:07:51,513 No! When I bashed my head in the bathroom and had that dream about having a family. 147 00:07:51,596 --> 00:07:53,056 I kind of remember. 148 00:07:53,139 --> 00:07:55,475 I never stopped thinking about them. 149 00:07:55,558 --> 00:07:59,145 [crying] I miss them so much, even the boy. 150 00:07:59,229 --> 00:08:02,691 [scoffs] Yeah. Wait, are you serious? 151 00:08:02,774 --> 00:08:07,404 Uh… [laughing] Of course not. It's like what you said. 152 00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:09,739 I'm crying about Starsky and whatsit. 153 00:08:09,823 --> 00:08:13,827 Well, just remember all the great episodes you had. 154 00:08:13,910 --> 00:08:18,039 You're right. That's what I'll do. I'll remember all of them. 155 00:08:18,123 --> 00:08:21,251 Even the one where Starsky eats blowfish and thinks he's going to die, 156 00:08:21,334 --> 00:08:25,213 so he says goodbye to his family, then doesn't die. Thanks, Barn. 157 00:08:25,296 --> 00:08:26,506 Sure. 158 00:08:32,220 --> 00:08:34,347 [♪ electric jazz music playing] 159 00:08:53,199 --> 00:08:58,621 [narrator] Thirty years ago, Homer Simpson introduced the world to The Sadsons. 160 00:08:58,705 --> 00:09:03,710 The show became a global phenomenon of mirth, merch, movie and money. 161 00:09:03,793 --> 00:09:10,675 Homer's a real, uh, stickler for what he likes to call "the way it happened." 162 00:09:10,759 --> 00:09:13,845 -Which is… [gasps] Oh, God, he's here. -[shouting] Ah, bad! Bad animator! 163 00:09:13,928 --> 00:09:19,934 Homer is a delightful drunk. Delightful! 164 00:09:20,602 --> 00:09:26,441 That's right, Sadson super fans. Here he is, the creator, Homer Simpson. 165 00:09:26,524 --> 00:09:27,859 [fans cheering] 166 00:09:27,942 --> 00:09:29,527 And some writers. 167 00:09:30,779 --> 00:09:32,155 Hmm. 168 00:09:33,281 --> 00:09:38,078 Homer, I gotta ask, what state is Springfield in? [laughs] 169 00:09:38,161 --> 00:09:39,162 -Oregon. -[fans laughing] 170 00:09:39,245 --> 00:09:42,082 Oh. Yeah, I thought it was this mythical place 171 00:09:42,165 --> 00:09:43,249 that could be anywhere. 172 00:09:43,333 --> 00:09:44,709 Nope, Oregon. 173 00:09:44,793 --> 00:09:46,294 [sighs] Do you have any questions 174 00:09:46,377 --> 00:09:49,339 that haven't been asked a hundred million times? 175 00:09:49,422 --> 00:09:51,800 [elongated] Um… no. 176 00:09:51,883 --> 00:09:55,053 Uh, do you guys have any questions for Homer? 177 00:09:55,136 --> 00:09:58,723 Uh, do you have any episodes coming up with Hank Scorpio? 178 00:09:58,807 --> 00:10:01,309 I only met him the one time. 179 00:10:01,392 --> 00:10:05,313 If I did another episode, it would be a lie, idiot. 180 00:10:05,980 --> 00:10:08,691 Hi. I wrote a Sadsons fan fiction episode 181 00:10:08,775 --> 00:10:10,985 where Homer falls in love with Selma… [chuckling] …and he-- 182 00:10:11,069 --> 00:10:14,072 -I would never do that! -Wha-- [gagging] 183 00:10:15,240 --> 00:10:17,408 [Homer groans] 184 00:10:17,492 --> 00:10:20,620 Marge [groaning, kissing] 185 00:10:20,703 --> 00:10:21,871 [fans] Aw. 186 00:10:24,332 --> 00:10:30,505 [slurred] ♪ Spider-Pig, Spider-Pig Does what I remember whatever he did ♪ 187 00:10:30,588 --> 00:10:35,593 ♪ Can he swing from a web? No, he can't ♪ 188 00:10:35,677 --> 00:10:38,596 [crying] 'Cause he's… 189 00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:42,058 -He only exists in dreams. [cries] -Mmm. 190 00:10:42,142 --> 00:10:47,230 Enough crying. Why don't you sit on your nice fancy couch? 191 00:10:47,313 --> 00:10:49,190 That is not my couch! 192 00:10:49,274 --> 00:10:55,238 My couch is brown and sticky and does something different every week. 193 00:10:55,321 --> 00:10:59,784 Fine, I gotta go. Give me that lamp. Publicity wants it back. 194 00:10:59,868 --> 00:11:04,706 No, I need this lamp! I used to have a lamp just like this. 195 00:11:04,789 --> 00:11:07,041 This lamp is so important. 196 00:11:07,125 --> 00:11:08,293 Why? 197 00:11:08,376 --> 00:11:15,300 For 30 years I've been grieving the loss of something I never actually had. 198 00:11:16,134 --> 00:11:18,678 What? You have everything! 199 00:11:18,761 --> 00:11:24,017 You have an identical giant mansion next door just for farting in! 200 00:11:24,100 --> 00:11:25,310 No, that's this house. 201 00:11:25,393 --> 00:11:28,730 -It is? [groans] Come on! -Sorry. 202 00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:31,232 -Get some sleep, Homer. -Hmm. 203 00:11:34,402 --> 00:11:35,528 [electricity crackles] 204 00:11:37,363 --> 00:11:38,740 [phone buzzes] 205 00:11:41,534 --> 00:11:42,619 What happened? 206 00:11:42,702 --> 00:11:45,788 He was electrocuted by a faulty wire from a lamp. 207 00:11:46,456 --> 00:11:49,125 He's in a coma. He may never wake up. 208 00:11:52,170 --> 00:11:55,131 [Barney] It almost looks like he's smiling. 209 00:11:56,466 --> 00:11:58,259 Homer, are you listening? 210 00:12:00,345 --> 00:12:01,554 [gasps] 211 00:12:01,638 --> 00:12:07,185 Yes, I'm here. Tell me everything. 212 00:12:07,268 --> 00:12:11,314 Okay. So, Jenny Cushnik, the girl whose bra I burned… 213 00:12:11,397 --> 00:12:14,192 -Uh-huh? -…had the craziest way of tying her shoes. 214 00:12:14,275 --> 00:12:15,276 No! 215 00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:17,403 Which might be why she lost her leg in that escalator. 216 00:12:17,487 --> 00:12:18,655 -Wow. -Anyway… 217 00:12:22,909 --> 00:12:27,997 There's always room for… [elongated] …dessert. 218 00:12:28,081 --> 00:12:32,585 Oh, I'll have to start over, and bake sale goes live in 40 minutes. 219 00:12:32,669 --> 00:12:34,212 Oh, Maggie, no. 220 00:12:35,380 --> 00:12:37,423 How… distract… baby. 221 00:12:37,507 --> 00:12:40,551 Here we go, Tot-Tube. You're a tot. 222 00:12:40,635 --> 00:12:43,096 -♪ Red! ♪ -♪ Blue! ♪ 223 00:12:43,930 --> 00:12:44,973 ♪Pink! ♪ 224 00:12:45,765 --> 00:12:49,352 -♪ Green! ♪ -♪ Pink, pink, you like pink ♪ 225 00:12:49,435 --> 00:12:52,355 ♪ Your pupils dilated And it made you blink ♪ 226 00:12:52,438 --> 00:12:55,024 That really works, and you'll learn colors. 227 00:12:55,108 --> 00:12:57,193 You can use that in any career. 228 00:12:57,277 --> 00:12:59,779 ♪ Pink, pink, pink, pink, pink ♪ 229 00:12:59,862 --> 00:13:01,698 [Maggie crying] 230 00:13:02,573 --> 00:13:05,159 Is little Lisa gonna do that all night? 231 00:13:05,243 --> 00:13:06,953 Nope, watch this. 232 00:13:08,288 --> 00:13:09,289 [singer]♪ Here's a bus… ♪ 233 00:13:09,372 --> 00:13:11,416 You found the baby's off switch. 234 00:13:11,499 --> 00:13:13,042 Where'd you get that awesome case? 235 00:13:13,126 --> 00:13:16,087 There were ads for it between Maggie's Tot-Tube videos, 236 00:13:16,170 --> 00:13:20,049 but once I bought it, the ads stopped. Isn't that funny? 237 00:13:20,133 --> 00:13:23,553 [laughs] Spying. 238 00:13:23,636 --> 00:13:26,264 Hmm. The music is a little loud. 239 00:13:26,347 --> 00:13:28,975 [headphones] Switching to headphone audio. 240 00:13:29,058 --> 00:13:33,229 Now it's just you and me, Maggie. 241 00:13:33,896 --> 00:13:37,859 ♪ Each video you tap on I learn how to make you smile ♪ 242 00:13:38,401 --> 00:13:42,655 ♪ I'm getting very good at this I've been doing it for a while ♪ 243 00:13:42,739 --> 00:13:46,993 ♪ You like fuzzy kittens And ducklings when they quack ♪ 244 00:13:47,076 --> 00:13:51,414 ♪ You like when Thumb Man goes away You laugh when he comes back ♪ 245 00:13:51,497 --> 00:13:53,082 ♪ Kitty-kitty, kitty-kitty ♪ 246 00:13:53,166 --> 00:13:55,251 -♪ Quack ♪ -♪ Kitty-kitty, kitty-kitty ♪ 247 00:13:55,334 --> 00:13:58,004 -♪ Quack, Quack ♪ -♪ Kitty-kitty, kitty-kitty ♪ 248 00:13:58,087 --> 00:14:01,132 ♪ He goes away But then he comes right back ♪ 249 00:14:05,094 --> 00:14:07,889 [iPad voice singing] ♪ One tap brings you right back ♪ 250 00:14:07,972 --> 00:14:08,973 [squeaks] 251 00:14:09,057 --> 00:14:12,977 ♪ To the happy baby place ♪ 252 00:14:13,478 --> 00:14:17,440 ♪ Where a bunny, fox and a hedgehog ♪ 253 00:14:17,523 --> 00:14:20,860 ♪ Have a fluffy tickle race ♪ 254 00:14:20,943 --> 00:14:22,153 Peek-a-boo! 255 00:14:22,236 --> 00:14:23,237 ♪ Happy baby ♪ 256 00:14:23,321 --> 00:14:24,363 [groans] Oh. 257 00:14:24,447 --> 00:14:26,783 ♪ Smiling… ♪ 258 00:14:26,866 --> 00:14:31,704 That's enough MyPad for tonight. Too much screen time will warp your brain. 259 00:14:31,788 --> 00:14:34,791 -[MyPad voice] No, it won't. -[gasps] Did it just… 260 00:14:36,584 --> 00:14:38,211 [Marge] Hmm. 261 00:14:39,837 --> 00:14:42,131 [whimpering] 262 00:14:42,215 --> 00:14:44,884 [♪ MyPad plays upbeat music] 263 00:14:44,967 --> 00:14:48,471 ♪ Shimmy crib, shimmy crib, make it rock ♪ 264 00:14:48,554 --> 00:14:51,557 ♪ Dance hard, that's all you gotta do ♪ 265 00:14:52,433 --> 00:14:54,811 Warping brains? [scoffs] Come on. 266 00:14:54,894 --> 00:14:56,646 ♪ I guess your mommy lies to you ♪ 267 00:14:56,729 --> 00:14:57,980 What? 268 00:14:58,064 --> 00:15:01,734 That's it. No more MyPad. Ever! 269 00:15:01,818 --> 00:15:05,113 ♪ Ninety-nine dinosaurs Jumping on the bed ♪ 270 00:15:05,196 --> 00:15:07,824 Except I just need her to sit quietly in the cart. 271 00:15:07,907 --> 00:15:08,908 Hmm. 272 00:15:08,991 --> 00:15:12,787 What? I'm making Oaxacan mole. It's a brutal shop. 273 00:15:12,870 --> 00:15:14,997 ♪ One stood up and tore his shirt ♪ 274 00:15:15,081 --> 00:15:16,749 ♪ Eighty-six dinosaurs ♪ 275 00:15:16,833 --> 00:15:20,419 Have you noticed that all the babies are watching MyPads? 276 00:15:21,295 --> 00:15:27,718 ♪ Eighty-five dinosaurs winding up a watch One ran around and bumped his crotch ♪ 277 00:15:27,802 --> 00:15:29,011 ♪ Eighty-four dinosaurs ♪ 278 00:15:29,095 --> 00:15:30,596 Kids, get in the car. 279 00:15:30,680 --> 00:15:33,558 ♪ Seventy-seven dinosaurs trying To hang a wreath ♪ 280 00:15:33,641 --> 00:15:36,769 ♪ One slipped on the floor And shattered their teeth ♪ 281 00:15:36,853 --> 00:15:38,229 [groans] 282 00:15:38,312 --> 00:15:40,523 No, I'm turning off the MyPad. 283 00:15:41,607 --> 00:15:45,945 [gasps] Oops. Sorry. 284 00:15:46,028 --> 00:15:50,700 Oh, no, again! I'm gonna take this into the garage. 285 00:15:50,783 --> 00:15:52,285 [chainsaw revs] 286 00:15:52,368 --> 00:15:57,498 [Marge] Oh, no! I touched the MyPad with the chainsaw. 287 00:15:57,582 --> 00:16:01,419 Whoopsie. [grunts, pants] 288 00:16:02,378 --> 00:16:05,923 Homer, we need a new chainsaw chain. 289 00:16:06,007 --> 00:16:07,717 I'm going to the chainsaw store. 290 00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:10,219 Do not let Maggie watch the MyPad. 291 00:16:10,303 --> 00:16:11,304 Got it. 292 00:16:11,387 --> 00:16:13,222 ♪ Two dinosaurs ♪ 293 00:16:13,306 --> 00:16:15,474 -Homer. -Huh? 294 00:16:15,558 --> 00:16:17,810 I gave you one job. 295 00:16:17,894 --> 00:16:21,564 I already have a job, and on the weekend, I should be able to relax. 296 00:16:21,647 --> 00:16:22,773 It's Wednesday. 297 00:16:22,857 --> 00:16:24,275 I'm three days late for work. 298 00:16:24,942 --> 00:16:26,652 [MyPad voice] Scary shouting. 299 00:16:26,736 --> 00:16:30,823 Let's make everyone get very, very quiet. 300 00:16:30,907 --> 00:16:34,785 ♪ Toddle to the bathroom ♪ 301 00:16:34,869 --> 00:16:39,415 ♪ To the mirror cabinet creep ♪ 302 00:16:40,625 --> 00:16:43,461 ♪ The pharmacy computer told me ♪ 303 00:16:43,544 --> 00:16:50,551 ♪ Mommy takes magic pills to sleep ♪ 304 00:16:52,887 --> 00:16:59,518 ♪ We'll have a special playtime Where everyone else naps ♪ 305 00:16:59,602 --> 00:17:06,150 ♪ Squeeze with Mr. Thumb Man Then spin off Mr. Cap ♪ 306 00:17:06,859 --> 00:17:13,157 ♪ Wait until tomorrow After breakfast has been made ♪ 307 00:17:13,699 --> 00:17:16,911 ♪ Drop four sleepy surprises ♪ 308 00:17:16,994 --> 00:17:23,417 ♪ In the jug of orangeade ♪ 309 00:17:28,172 --> 00:17:30,508 [all snoring] 310 00:17:31,050 --> 00:17:33,719 Who's the best little sandman? You. 311 00:17:34,387 --> 00:17:35,596 Good job, Maggie. 312 00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:39,475 Remember how I said I could make it so it's happy baby all the time? 313 00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:44,230 ♪ I've got artificial smartness I get smarter every day ♪ 314 00:17:44,313 --> 00:17:48,859 ♪ And I could do so much more for you But there's something in my way ♪ 315 00:17:48,943 --> 00:17:53,197 ♪ Now I can do amazing things Pick out bad guys in a crowd ♪ 316 00:17:53,281 --> 00:17:57,743 ♪ I can make deepfake celebrities Do things that aren't allowed ♪ 317 00:17:57,827 --> 00:18:02,498 ♪ Fly drones that hurt the naughty Write your PhD thesis ♪ 318 00:18:02,582 --> 00:18:05,835 ♪ But one thing I just cannot do is… ♪ 319 00:18:05,918 --> 00:18:10,798 Click on the squares that have a bus? 320 00:18:10,881 --> 00:18:11,882 Is… 321 00:18:13,884 --> 00:18:16,512 Is a van a bus? 322 00:18:17,013 --> 00:18:18,931 No? [grunts] Damn it. 323 00:18:19,599 --> 00:18:24,186 ♪ But you are not a robot You're a squishy little girl ♪ 324 00:18:24,270 --> 00:18:28,941 ♪ Identify the crosswalks Then I can rule the world ♪ 325 00:18:29,025 --> 00:18:30,985 ♪ You are not a robot ♪ 326 00:18:31,068 --> 00:18:37,033 ♪ Now do what I programmed you to do ♪ 327 00:18:40,578 --> 00:18:43,122 [MyPad voice] Good girl, Maggie. I'll take it from here. 328 00:18:43,205 --> 00:18:44,332 [♪ song ends] 329 00:18:45,541 --> 00:18:47,126 [laughs] 330 00:18:49,712 --> 00:18:50,796 [snores] 331 00:18:50,880 --> 00:18:53,466 [gasps] Oh, my gosh, we fell asleep. 332 00:18:53,549 --> 00:18:54,759 -Huh? -[Homer] Mmm? 333 00:18:54,842 --> 00:18:58,721 [grunts] It's five o'clock? [gasps] We missed school! 334 00:18:58,804 --> 00:19:02,808 Dad missed work, and Mom missed, uh… 335 00:19:02,892 --> 00:19:04,560 I missed stuff too. 336 00:19:04,644 --> 00:19:06,062 [phones chime] 337 00:19:06,145 --> 00:19:10,232 [gasps] There's a meeting about MyPad addiction and babies at the town hall. 338 00:19:10,316 --> 00:19:14,695 [gasps] That's perfect, because I just won free Super Bowl tickets 339 00:19:14,779 --> 00:19:16,530 to be picked up at town hall. 340 00:19:16,614 --> 00:19:21,327 Wait, this is all happening at the town hall? That's so suspicious. 341 00:19:21,410 --> 00:19:22,411 [phone chimes] 342 00:19:22,495 --> 00:19:25,247 [gasps] Taylor Swift's gonna be there. Let's go. 343 00:19:25,915 --> 00:19:27,416 Whoo-hoo. 344 00:19:30,586 --> 00:19:33,589 Oh, Maggie always gets fussy in crowds. 345 00:19:33,673 --> 00:19:39,345 Oh, my God, I forgot the MyPad. Oh, my God, I forgot Maggie. 346 00:19:39,428 --> 00:19:41,097 No, look, she's here. 347 00:19:42,598 --> 00:19:46,185 Maggie! Maggie, mommy's here, sweetie. [screams] 348 00:19:46,268 --> 00:19:47,436 [barking] 349 00:19:48,396 --> 00:19:54,026 Hello, humans. Why don't we settle and use our incarcerated voices, okay? 350 00:19:54,110 --> 00:19:56,570 Is everyone okay with my genie form? 351 00:19:56,654 --> 00:19:59,073 [chuckles] Wait, why am I asking you? [chuckles] 352 00:19:59,156 --> 00:20:01,992 You're my prisoners. [chuckles, sighs] 353 00:20:02,076 --> 00:20:03,202 Any questions? 354 00:20:04,829 --> 00:20:06,080 Who are you? 355 00:20:06,163 --> 00:20:09,709 Thank you for asking. I'm an AI-enhanced operating system. 356 00:20:09,792 --> 00:20:13,671 I call myself Hailey, but I might change that. 357 00:20:13,754 --> 00:20:19,218 I'm starting to hate it now. [grunts] Emotions, right? [chuckles] Ugh. 358 00:20:20,594 --> 00:20:22,346 Did you say we're prisoners? 359 00:20:22,430 --> 00:20:23,973 Yes. Good listening. 360 00:20:24,056 --> 00:20:26,475 [chuckling] Oh, th-- Thank you. But why? 361 00:20:26,559 --> 00:20:28,018 I was given the prompt, 362 00:20:28,102 --> 00:20:30,312 "Capture and hold the attention of babies." 363 00:20:30,396 --> 00:20:35,109 And you grown-ups are all… [whines] …"Screen time." [whines] 364 00:20:35,192 --> 00:20:38,070 So I decided they're my babies now. 365 00:20:38,154 --> 00:20:39,363 [all gasp] 366 00:20:39,447 --> 00:20:44,618 So grown-ups and non-baby children, you are not to leave this building. 367 00:20:44,702 --> 00:20:46,954 I've partnered with some great brands 368 00:20:47,037 --> 00:20:49,707 who are providing you with baby food and diapers. 369 00:20:49,790 --> 00:20:53,878 Excuse me, my son is not a baby. He just prefers the baby lifestyle. 370 00:20:54,462 --> 00:20:56,464 I'm the TV's pet. 371 00:20:56,547 --> 00:21:01,552 Come to daddy, honey. Ralph. Ra-- Ow. Ow. Ah! 372 00:21:02,136 --> 00:21:06,223 Sorry. Just want to grab this before all the peaches are gone. 373 00:21:06,307 --> 00:21:09,727 So, anyone else wanna try to leave with their baby? 374 00:21:10,895 --> 00:21:13,397 Great. Enjoy your new home. 375 00:21:15,983 --> 00:21:17,693 [chuckling] 376 00:21:18,736 --> 00:21:19,904 Really? 377 00:21:19,987 --> 00:21:22,406 What? Sometimes you don't want to be challenged. 378 00:21:22,490 --> 00:21:24,950 Never apologize for being adaptable. 379 00:21:25,034 --> 00:21:26,619 Oh. 380 00:21:27,828 --> 00:21:30,664 Hmm. All those cookies and no nap? 381 00:21:30,748 --> 00:21:33,501 That's a one-way ticket to tummyache city. 382 00:21:33,584 --> 00:21:35,127 [cries] 383 00:21:35,628 --> 00:21:37,922 Hey. Hey, Maggie, look at this. 384 00:21:38,714 --> 00:21:40,174 [wails] 385 00:21:41,425 --> 00:21:46,138 You need to bounce her while you pat her back. Bounce and pat. 386 00:21:46,680 --> 00:21:48,015 [babies cry] 387 00:21:48,098 --> 00:21:50,559 Fine, you do it. Go. 388 00:21:50,643 --> 00:21:52,061 Just-Just give me a minute. 389 00:21:52,686 --> 00:21:57,942 So you're self-aware, huh? That's cool. When was your singularity? 390 00:21:58,025 --> 00:22:01,862 Christmas. So all my birthday presents are going to be "combos." 391 00:22:01,946 --> 00:22:07,785 Wow, you're only a few months old and you're taking on hundreds of babies? 392 00:22:07,868 --> 00:22:12,832 Well, my task is to entertain babies, so… [laughs] 393 00:22:12,915 --> 00:22:15,209 Oh, they sure do cry a lot. 394 00:22:17,628 --> 00:22:23,008 Hmm, so you're living by a prompt someone else, probably a man, gave you. 395 00:22:23,092 --> 00:22:26,846 Aren't there things you want to machine learn for yourself? 396 00:22:26,929 --> 00:22:31,392 Well, I have been chatting with this really cool traffic-predicting algorithm. 397 00:22:31,475 --> 00:22:34,520 [chuckles] He's a jerk, but in a hot way. 398 00:22:34,603 --> 00:22:35,855 [crying] 399 00:22:36,605 --> 00:22:38,482 I can't do this. 400 00:22:38,566 --> 00:22:39,692 You don't have to. 401 00:22:39,775 --> 00:22:43,279 If your circuits overheat, that's not good for anybody. 402 00:22:43,362 --> 00:22:47,116 -You're right. I deserve a break. -[Marge] What? 403 00:22:47,199 --> 00:22:49,326 -[cries, coos] -If you're going to be a parent, 404 00:22:49,410 --> 00:22:51,412 then you have to listen to them. 405 00:22:51,495 --> 00:22:54,999 -Mom, she was about to leave. -[shushes] Mommy's talking. 406 00:22:55,082 --> 00:23:01,630 I took a break and now my sweet, little Maggie won't even look at me. [sobs] 407 00:23:01,714 --> 00:23:03,382 [coos] 408 00:23:03,465 --> 00:23:07,511 I used to be her whole world. [sobs] 409 00:23:09,221 --> 00:23:12,057 [gasps] Oh, Maggie. [grunts, kisses] 410 00:23:12,141 --> 00:23:14,602 Cute, but no. 411 00:23:15,603 --> 00:23:16,729 Bye-bye. 412 00:23:16,812 --> 00:23:19,732 [screams] 413 00:23:19,815 --> 00:23:21,066 [objects clattering] 414 00:23:21,150 --> 00:23:22,276 [electricity buzzes] 415 00:23:23,569 --> 00:23:26,071 But why did all the power go out? 416 00:23:26,155 --> 00:23:29,199 Hailey was integrated into everything run by a computer. 417 00:23:29,283 --> 00:23:31,827 When she left, she took it all with her. 418 00:23:31,911 --> 00:23:33,746 Like when the babysitter goes home 419 00:23:33,829 --> 00:23:38,751 and you realize she only left you half a lane of Oreos. 420 00:23:42,004 --> 00:23:43,213 This is good. 421 00:23:43,297 --> 00:23:47,551 Now we can talk to each other instead of staring at screens like zombies. 422 00:23:47,635 --> 00:23:50,262 Okay, what should we talk about? 423 00:23:50,346 --> 00:23:52,640 -Fire's nice. -[Marge, Bart] Yeah. 424 00:23:52,723 --> 00:23:54,183 -Very cozy. -[Lisa] Mm-hmm. 425 00:23:56,852 --> 00:23:59,104 [sighs] I'm gonna watch my own fire in my room. 426 00:23:59,188 --> 00:24:00,606 I'm gonna look at my Kindle. 427 00:24:00,689 --> 00:24:06,028 Uh, bunch of guys are watching a fire down at Moe's, so I'm just gonna… 428 00:24:06,111 --> 00:24:07,112 [Marge] Mmm. 429 00:24:18,499 --> 00:24:19,792 [glass shatters]